I'm back. Home. We did it. We built a house. It feels pretty good.
Yet, somehow, all I can think about is the people. My teammates. My workmates. The Fuller Center Crew. Cristina's family. Jesus.
Our first day in Las Penitas, before we started working.
Coming into this trip, I had a lot of fear. It was strange and unprecedented. Unexpected. Anxiety comes from the weirdest places, and it kept me awake all night before we left for Nicaragua. Why? I am almost ashamed to admit that I was scared of the people. I was scared of traveling with a group of people I didn't know. What will they think of me? I was scared to meet the family we would be building for. How will we communicate? I was scared to work in Nicaragua. What is the perception of "white people" in Las Penitas? The Holy Spirit brought 2 Timothy 1:7 to my mind that night at 3:30 am: "But God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and love and a sound mind." During this trip, the truth of the Lord broke my chains and left me empty of my defenses, then covered me with grace and strength, building relationships where walls once stood. He conquered my fearful spirit by being faithful in His promises. I'm walking away from a week in one of the poorest places in the world, feeling like the richest girl alive because I have had the opportunity to serve a loving, just and merciful God who died for me, who renews my strength day by day, and who is continually shaping me into the woman He designed. He wrote me into His story, and it is such a blessing.
This picture speaks the thousands of words that I can't. It shows the love among us that turned strangers into family. I am awed by the humble and hardworking spirit of our trip leader, Hailey D; Kyla's maturity and commitment to the Lord; the wise stewarding of gifts by Curt along with his fearlessness; Nicole's gentleness, complemented by her unrelenting pursuit of God's purposes in any and every situation; Halie B's mothering instinct, incessant preoccupation with the broken, and desire to proclaim God's redeeming power. I laughed with 'Berto and Benito about my broken Spanish language skills and marveled after their perseverance. Santos patiently helped us with our translations, led us throughout the building process, and always greeted us with a smile. Danilo organized everything we could have needed or wanted; Nubia selflessly washed our dirty, ragged clothing after long, sweaty days in the sun; Ervin and his cousin Norman laughed with us and showed us what it means to sacrifice leisure for the benefit of others. I am so grateful for the group of people in the picture above. It was an honor to serve God with them, and we now share a special connection and the unique commonality of having labored together for our Lord: a fruit that will keep on giving.
Overall, I experienced God in a new way on this trip through relationality. In the past, I've had discipleship/mentoring relationships, but there is something different about altogether giving of ourselves as a group. We were united as a body this week by our shared love for God and the progression of our shared experiences. Each one of us came from a different background and most of us are now at home in Christ's church, though we are still waiting on God's intervention for a few. But nonetheless, a new meaning was given to Jesus's proclamation that the poor are blessed, and that they are our brothers and sisters. We all are God's beloved, and it's so beautiful to choose to allow grace to reign despite our own inadequacies, living in the freedom of Christ. The church is the bride of Jesus, and He is our leader, our role model and our savior. He is what gives us unity, and it is incredible to deliberately leave the comfortable Christian bubble to be found among the lost. I can't wait to see God continue to work in and through this amazing group of people, and I'm so grateful to have had the opportunity to know them for eternity.
Breaking bread. It's the best!
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